Suck it in and move on - REALLY?

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You know those days, when you just want to sit down in a corner and not do anything - at all! When you can feel the world melting away in silence and all you hear is the wall clock's, tick tock. Well I've been experiencing that feeling for a while now.

Why? let me take you through a description of myself. How I see it, I like to call myself a free birds, a gypsy, a day dreamer. I don't like to be strangled in a slow, steady, constant daily ride - I like roller coasters! But obviously all this seems a bit too dramatic sitting in an office environment, 8/9 hours a day, where the most exciting thing I do is, have lunch!

So yeah, I've been thinking of ways to bring on a change in my life, a change that will uplift me and make me more energetic, because honestly, I'm loosing all that there is in me.  I am so low, I don't want to talk, dress up, work on anything productive or eat. Well actually, that's not true, I'm eating a lot, I'm eating all the junk there is available around me. This includes the peanut butter jar, which by the way is staring at me, from behind my laptop.

I've tried almost all the things on my checklist - except exercise to bring on a change. Actually I very firmly believe in going green, going healthy, but than Biryani makes me cheat, and my husband feeds me chocolates everyday anyway, so I just skip exercise, because we all know, Chocolates, Biryani and workout are not a good combination. But I guess, you never know, maybe I will start working out one day - maybe.

Coming back to my rant, the list includes MUSIC - I usually start off with upbeat tracks and end up listening to something very slow and mellow dramatic. COOKING, I love to cook, and I do it often .. but usually by the end of it am super exhausted, sometimes even too sweaty to sit and enjoy the meal. TELEVISION, ohhh, that screen I'm sure we all pay too much for, but unfortunately never find any suitable show on it. You come across the most stupidest commercials and soaps, wondering what in the world is wrong with this world. This is the maximum punishment, if you are lucky enough not to come across the news channels, of course. You'll either end up smashing the controller or in my case, I just put it on mute and start using my phone for Instagram and games. Than we have ARTS & CRAFT or SELF CARE etc, but they too make me sooo very tired . In short, nothing makes me excited, nothing at all!

I'm like the sadness from the movie "Inside Out". I cant see the ray of light - at all! So to cut it short, I here by announce that I will start writing now.  Will write everyday, and I will make sure I put my feelings into words. My friends tell me I'm actually very interesting when I'm sad or upset. Like I talk shit, but make it sound all important. There's also a possibility of some highs of sarcasm and wit, which honestly is never a bad idea.

Well obviously I hope that some of you out there will be reading it too. Because I'm sure there are many like me, plus you don't want me to go back to that dark, ungrateful state, where there's no light? LOL. I'm know I'm evil to be sounding like an emotionally challenged person right now, but the truth is I'm amazing, life is perfect .. and I want you all to see that - I want to share my experiences, my highs and lows, joys and failures. I will be funny and i will be useful too. Promise!

Hoping to see you all around!